Reason for The Trojan War:  Dramatic Reading

Roles:  Narrator, Eris (goddess of spite/discord) , Paris (the playboy), Aphrodite (goddess of love/lust), Hera (goddess of power), Athena (goddess of wisdom) and Zeus (god of the heavens and king of all the gods).

Narrator:  Almost everybody has heard of Achilles, the great romantic warrior killed in the Trojan War. Ironically, this war that would take his life, actually had its seeds at the marriage celebration of his parents. His mother was Thetis (thee-tis), a Naried [nare-ee-id] who could change shapes, and his father was Peleus (pell-ee-us), whose first wife hung herself because he was unfaithful to her.

Let me take you to the marriage celebration. I hear someone who was specifically uninvited, for good reason, is going to appear. I fear this may end up a problem.

Eris (Enter from the back of the room and call out to the gods up at the front of the room):   I am Eris. All were invited to this marriage except me, The Goddess of Spite.  I was disappointed not to be invited, but I have come anyway, and even brought a gift.

You gods say I sow discord, bringing disharmony and chaos, something that makes you uncomfortable, but ironically all of you seem to actively seek out disharmony with your intrigues every day!

Perhaps you would blame anything that went wrong at your little party on me. But, I see all the gods and goddesses having a wonderful time. To add to the festivities I have brought this beautiful golden apple, a rare treasure, as a prize for a little contest. The apple is inscribed, “For the fairest.” 

[Place the apple on the podium announcing:]  Zeus, this apple must be awarded to the most beautiful of the 3 goddesses:  Hera, Athena or Aphrodite.” 

Narrator:  All the gods, especially Zeus, fear disobeying Eris, the Goddess of Spite, because who knows what consequence they might each receive if her request is ignored?

However, at the same time, each of the three competitive goddesses is very flattered and interested in this contest. At this time let the three contestants in this beauty contest introduce themselves.

Hera:  I am Hera, the sister and wife of Zeus. I am the goddess of marriage. I get jealous easily and when I get jealous I get mean. 

I have the ability to give power and take it away. With my help great kings rule great lands.

Athena:  I am Athena.  Though I am a powerful woman, I have never married. I was born from Zeus’s head and have tremendous wisdom, insight and might. I am known as the goddess of both wisdom and civilization, I am unbeatable in combat because I can combine intelligence, cunning and great wisdom.  I will let no man lose a battle if I chose to be on his side.

Aphrodite:  I am Aphrodite and I represent Romance. Some call me the goddess of love and others say I represent Lust.  I am irresistibly charming and can make sane men go mad, obsessed with romantic urges.  I celebrate with joyous enthusiasm the mating of men and women.

Zeus: All three of these goddesses are fair and powerful: my two sisters and my wife. It would not be fair for me to chose among them. They are each beautiful in their own way.

[In an aside to the audience] Let me think to myself. If I chose one of these goddesses, like my wife who I am sure would expect me to select her, what would be the reaction of the other two?

I don't think any of the immortals should be put in a position to chose. We have enough problems between each other. Chosing one over the others would just add more jealousies and conflict between us. However, I cannot publicly humiliate Eris by rejecting her contest offer. Who knows what she would do to punish me for that? I must remain hospitable and polite to my guest.

[Addressing gods and class]Attention! I have come to a decision. I will call upon Paris, a handsome mortal in the rich kingdom of Troy, to make this decision. Let this human, used to the dazzling mortal women surrounding him, pick the fairest of our three lovely goddesses.

Narrator: So Paris was found in his kingdom and duly notified of his "honor." He was summoned and transported up to Mt. Olympus, an honor reserved for only those in great favor with the gods, and privately told the nature of the contest.

Paris:  I am Paris, a mortal man who has been walking among my flocks on Mt. Ida.  My father is the very wealthy king of Troy, the richest city in the world.  I have been called to judge which goddess is the most beautiful. I always enjoy beauty contests.   Now, whom should I chose as the most beautiful?

Should I choose Hera, the bequeather of power?
Should I choose Athena, the wise warrior?
Or... should I choose Aphrodite, the sex goddess?

Narrator:  Separately, each goddess went over to Paris who was sitting by himself, viewing the goddesses from afar, trying to figure out which goddess he should pronounce the most beautiful. Admittedly, beauty means different things to different people, and trying to discern how to vote became a serious undertaking for him. To help sway his decision, each powerful goddess snuck up to him privately to try to influence his vote.

[Each goddess now goes up to Paris separately and tries to persuade him...]

Hera, speaking with authority:  If you choose me, the powerful Hera, strong and important Paris, I would make you ruler of all Asia.  You would have great power to rule with as you pleased. Whatever kingdom you desired would be yours.

Athena, speaking like an intelligent business advisor:  Paris, you are a well-educated man. You would know that if you chose me, Athena, the wise warrior goddess, wisdom and victory would belong to you in all battles.  You would be indefeatable! I am the wisest choice.

Aphrodite [sauntering over to Paris and flirting]:  My handsome, desirable Paris... ....(touch his arm and pause)..... if you see me, the loving, irresistible Aphrodite, as the most beautiful, I promise you the undying love of the most beautiful woman in the world.  You would be satisfied with romantic pleasures from her beyond your wildest dreams for the rest of your life.

Narrator [to the class]: Think for a moment. What would a rich, good-looking young man choose? Power? Wisdom? Or ... romance from the most beautiful woman in the world?

[Pause, so everyone can think that over.]

Paris (overcome with desire for Aphrodite) :  I treasure love above all else.  Aphrodite, you indeed are the most beautiful. You win the apple and my vote.

[Hand Aphrodite the golden apple.]

Aphrodite:  Ah, yes! I am the most beautiful and most irresistible creature in the universe.  You have chosen well.  And for the honor you have bestowed upon me, I award you the love of the most beautiful mortal in the world, Helen.

Hera [Walk over to Paris and say indignantly]: Paris, how dare you fall under the spell of Aphrodite and not see true beauty!  You have been dazzled by lust, not your logic!  You are a weak mortal and shall never rule the Trojan Empire of your father.  You have turned your back on power.

Athena (speaking with disdain):  Paris, you have chosen foolishly and you will suffer.  Helen is already married and without me, the goddess of war and wisdom, you will never be able be able to figure out how to successfully defend yourself against the wrath of her husband and his kingdom!!

Narrator: Paris was whisked back to his kingdom, dazzled by his experience with gods on the top of Mt. Olympus and hardly remembering the angry, spiteful words of the losers. He did not know whom Aphrodite was speaking about, as he had never heard of anyone named Helen, but Aphrodite remained transfixed in his memory as the most captivating goddess of all time.